What's My Spiritual Gift?

I was in class last night and we talked of the gifts of the Spirit and what ours are. My roommate from last year said she didn't know. I responded without hesitation "Hospitality and mercy." Ok, so I don't technically know if hospitality is a gift, but I've definitely seen the mercy aspect come out in our prayers together. I have seen the same thing manifest in other believers I've prayed with as well - they remember things in prayer that I never would and seem to enter into prayer for me in a way that touches and surprises me. It's actually been cool being here, because I'm starting to connect people with their gifts a little more clearly as I start to see the same things manifest in various people - such as a few friends with the gift of discernment.
But this leads to more troubling questions - why are we (as Christians) not more regularly and consistently calling out and encouraging one another in our giftings? Why don't we strive to practice them more?
I'm struck with two facts - (1) we have little faith that God is working in us (hence, no seeking to practice) and (2) we are not acting as the body in encouraging and exhorting one another in the giftings and talents we see in another's life. Out of this results a break down in the Body of Christ so that we do not fully function and people's giftings are failed to develop.
Some of this, I believe, is the result of our individualist, American culture - why should we bother encouraging one another if you're supposed to figure everything out for yourself? Sad that some people think this way, but true.
I think the other problem is that we are prideful - we hate to admit need. To allow others to exercise their gifts means admitting need - it's saying we don't have it all together ourselves and need this other person to minister to us (or saying the other person met a need we could not meet on our own).
My hope and prayer is that we will learn to encourage others in their gifts and to seek to exercise them for the glory of God - then may the church function more fully as the Body of Christ.