The past three weeks have been hard - hit by waves of different struggles in various aspects of my life. It hasn't been fun. I sat down and was talking with Jesus about some of it... and getting mad. Quite frankly, I know I'm having a real conversation with God if I get pissed-off; it lets me know that my true feelings are coming out and that I'm being honest, likely sinning, and allowing his grace to encompass me all the same.
I came to the point of telling God I was tired of this frustrating and stressful time and wanted to be done with it, I was just tired of waiting. Period. When I realized what I wrote I just about laughed because I was so focused on the circumstances. I often look at my circumstances and get angry because things don't seem to be going my way. But when I am looking at the circumstances, I am failing to keep my gaze steadily directed at God. Through every situation God is seeking to draw us to himself - secure us in our love, content us in his grace, cause us to realize that whatever else is going on around us he is still God and to be worshiped, adored and revered.
I learned a little about waiting with circumstances I did not like while I was single, but apparently God has more to teach me (well, maybe a LOT more to teach me). Proper perspective - what is needed to persevere through every circumstance in life and to endure the ever-present "waiting" phase.
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