I got to the end of yesterday and was feeling sort of "blah." Not that anything today was horrible or overwhelming, I just felt I had talked too much, not listened well, given advice when it was unneeded, interrupted others, been selfish and self-centered in some interactions, and not given God the glory when it was due. I came face to face with the fact that I sin. Regularly. God needs to change me from the inside out. He does not simply need to change my actions, but my attitudes and desires.
I sat down and talked with God about this - with all the ways I felt like I failed Him; wondering why He was leading me to a place of leadership where some of these things will become so much more visible and apparent.
His grace quieted me. He reminded me that He still uses me - regardless of my attitude and behavior, He in His infinite grace and wisdom can still work in and through me. And you. It is truly and totally not about me (or you), but about God working in His infinite glory to display Himself. My hope and prayer is that He may increase and I decrease; that He will continue to grow me and that His light may shine through me in bright and visible ways and I think not of myself, but of Him and His glory. But on those days when I feel absolutely down and out, may I ever remember that His grace is greater than all else and may I rest in His lovingkindness.
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